his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
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