Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Randomize