We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
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