Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
