Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Randomize
