I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
