She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
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