Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
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