i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
Randomize