I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
