can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
