I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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