You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
