On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
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