Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Randomize
