$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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