My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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