Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
Randomize
