wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Randomize
