I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Randomize
