hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
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