That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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