He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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