I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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