So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
