U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Randomize
