I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
Randomize
