I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
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