it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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