I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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