Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
i came on her dog
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Randomize
