just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Randomize
