I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
i've created a new STD.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
