The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
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