"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
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