I want to walk on stilts...naked
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
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