I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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