Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
