party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
