We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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