Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
he puts the penis in happiness.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
