I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
