Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
