Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
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