ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Randomize
