apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
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