I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Randomize
