i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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