if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
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