Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
These tits shall not be calmed
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
