Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
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