I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
Randomize
