Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
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